Thursday, October 21, 2010
To say "I miss her" would encompass more than you'd think. The depths to which I miss "her" vary depending on which "her" I am referring. Yes... I'm keeping it vague for a purpose, and so I will talk more in generalities than specifics here.
Lately I haven't been sleeping much... always fighting myself to turn it off, turn it down, or just turn down the bed so as to give myself a chance for a few precious moments of quiet. It doesn't come often, and lately it hasn't come at all. In the expanse of time which stretches across my evening, my mind replays things I said, did, felt, wished had happened... and I get sad. But let me be clear: I regret nothing I've done or said. In fact, I'm glad they have happened, as the experiences with these women have helped me know myself better. Sometimes we live and we love... and we move on.
"In your eyes I see things I know I cannot touch, I know not to reach for them - I let them touch me. And I cherish these moments that we're able to share, however fleeting they may be."